Much of my work originates from an act of probing my past in order to assess my present identity. I was an only child, and the solitude caused me to construct fantastical narratives in my mind. Yet because I never acted out these narratives with other children, they remained unfulfilled and passive, growing persistently in my imagination. As I edged towards adolescence, my fantasies expanded and transformed in the same way my body did, like a psychological component of puberty, but even then they remained unconsummated, becoming a complex personal mythology.
Now, as an adult and an artist, I am reinventing the dark and fantastical actions that I would never dare act out as a child. In many of my works, I depict characters who are longing for sexual and psychological interaction, but various barriers prevent them from engaging with one another. They remain perpetually isolated, vulnerable, and longing for companionship. Their desperate search is in fact my own.
I began my exploration in photography, but my most recent works have been in the medium of video. My videos are looped and the speed of the image is manipulated to go either extremely fast or slow, reducing the narratives to their fundamental expressions and relationships. The works are displayed on 7” screens that are matted and framed as if they were still photographs. Thus, the viewer is able to explore the ambiguity of the images, allowing them to be whatever they are at any given moment: a still image, a video, a moving painting. The audio component functions as a disjointing element, adding an unexpected playful quality to an otherwise dark and haunting narrative.
The latest chapters of my life have allowed me the opportunity to reexamine my ideas from many different perspectives. In the last five years, I have brought two new people into the world and also lost the two who brought me into this world. I have been an adult examining from the perspective of a child in my art. Now, as a parent, I am able to see myself in the role of my own mother, gaining a better understanding of how these cycles come together, full circle.